full_metal_ox (full_metal_ox) wrote in metaquotes,

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Have you seen this man? (And is he single?)

Proverbs 31:10-31, as updated and genderswapped by dungeonwriter:

An accomplished man, who can find? His value is far above his generous salary and benefits,
His wife's heart relies on him and she shall have a great fortune
He does her good and never evil all of her days
He seeks paychecks and dividends and works the stock market willingly
He is like a merchant ship, bringing groceries from Pomegranate* afar
He rises while it's still night and makes coffee for the household and breakfast for the children
He plans a home and buys it, and with the sweat of his brow, makes a Sukkah
He girds his arms in strength at the gym, and makes his core strong
He knows his portfolio is good and his IPAD does not dim at night
He sets his hand to Nordstroms and hands the credit card to his wife
He extends his hand to the community and lends a hand to the cause of Torah
He does not fear for his family in snow, for all his family is clothed beautifully
He buys covers for the windows, made of fine linen and eco efficient
He creates a start up company and sells it, he delivers profits for the investors
Strength and honor are his Brook Brother's suit, he smiles at his quarterly reports
He opens his mouth in wisdom and the lesson of his father is on his tongue
He watches over the household budget and does not allow the sin of spendthrift
His community lauds him, his wife is proud of him
"Many men I have dated, but you were the one who surpassed them all"
Name brands are deceptive, cars are fleeting, a man who puts you first, he shall be praised
Give him the fruits of his Roth IRA and let her praise him on Facebook

*Expensive kosher store in Brooklyn

Context friendslocked and QWP.

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