Aesthete & Ne'er-do-well (wingedelf) wrote in metaquotes,
Aesthete & Ne'er-do-well

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Pass me the Illudium P-38 Exploding Space Modulator?

thewronghands waxes poetic on a challenge to write the near impossible. In this case, a sestina about Marvin the Martian:

I, Marvin

My expected earth-shattering kaboom
Awaited, is not here. I blame the duck.
Rage turned inward, fists clenched, I stand angry,
Venus by earth occluded. My ray-gun
Is set to blow Earth to Dimension X,
No longer to obstruct the view from Mars.

My name is Marvin, and I hight from Mars
A mighty hero, fond of a kaboom
Renowned in battle in Dimension X
Victor against all comers but the duck
I lay about me with my good ray-gun
None shall survive. Do not make me angry.

Many space dwellers dared make me angry
All found their deaths upon the field of Mars,
Red ruin on the Red Planet. Ray-gun
Vaporization, or, perhaps, kaboom,
Incinerate, destroy. But that cursed duck
Never fell prey and fled Dimension X.

My armies sallied from Dimension X
And themselves failed. Again, I grew angry.
Revenge is sweeter when it's served with duck,
Victory is the sweetest sup of Mars.
I lay in wait, preparing my kaboom
Neutrinos chambered in my good ray-gun.

More pity that I needed no ray-gun.
All armies waiting from Dimension X
Recevied a near-reciprocal kaboom
Vendetta from Duck Dodgers. I, angry,
Incensed at the cowardly strike on Mars,
Now swore to hurl the heavens at the duck.

My nemesis, my enemy, my duck
A vengeance waits for you in my ray-gun.
Recall that no one can escape from Mars
Vanquished, I'll bring you to Dimension X
In chains and lasers. Don't make me angry
Not just yet. I still have one more kaboom.

And when that kaboom serves you well, oh duck,
I won't be angry. I'll raise my ray-gun,
The hero of Dimension X and Mars.

f-locked original, quoted with permission.

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