actually, that's beaten by a Vancouver craigslisting of particular weirdness.
" Do you love to play Super Mario Brothers on the Classic Nintendo System? Do you like to get tagged from behind while you do it? This is the post for you, then. "
including such gems as
" When level 2 begins and Mario walks into the pipe, I will penetrate you. "
" If you die I will pull out and spank you until the level restarts. "
Later, fungo_squiggly adds:
"If you are die because you run out of time I will ejaculate prematurely."
"If you are hit by an enemy, I will become limp and flaccid until such time as you collect a mushroom and become Super Mario again."
Context is comics about letting venereal disease get in the way of true love.
EDIT: To hell with the cut
EDIT 2: MOAR