I was starting to get irritated. I hate it when people pitch fits about the non-existence of paperbacks. I prepared to pitch my voice to be heard above his bellowing...
...but then he gave voice to the most singular statement I've heard since taking this job.
"Aw, c'mon. I know you've got 'em all in the back and you're just not allowed to put 'em out yet. Well, I know you've got 'em there, so get me one!"
I sincerely hoped I wasn't understanding him correctly.
I said: "...hwuh?"
Unfortnunately, I had understood him just fine. "I know you bookstores have all the books in the back. I know they send them all to you at the same time and just make you wait to put them out. So go look! I know you'll find it!"
I thought, all at the same time:
"What the hell?"
"All the books in the world in my stockroom, including future books!... I'd never leave work! Ever!"
"Might be worth a try. The damn place is so messy there's probably a lost civilization of pygmies back there somewhere."
"... you bookstores?"
"He's yanking my chain. He's gotta be yanking my chain."
"Nope, he's dead serious. He really thinks we've got every book EVER in our stockroom!"
"OH MY GOD, L-SPACE! He thinks we've got L-SPACE in our stockroom! ALL of L-Space! Like downloading the internet or something! OH MY GOD!"
"I hope I don't bust out laughing. I doubt he'd understand."
"Ohgod, the Librarian would splat this guy!"
"No, seriously. WHAT? THE HELL?"
Context likes Terry Pratchett and wishes all sucky customers were this entertaining. Open post, QWP.