Amanda Sharpe (amandathegreat) wrote in metaquotes,
Amanda Sharpe
amandathegreat
metaquotes

Mr. James "flemco" Grant reads an article on drug slang and is compelled to respond:


LIST OF TERMS IN THAT ARTICLE I HAVE NEVER, EVER HEARD:

- Psychedelic Heroin for Ketamine. Uh, no. I don't think any teen would ever use such a retarded term for a drug. How is that even a codename to hide what you're asking for?
BOBBY: Man, we gotta come up with another word for Ketamine so the 'rents won't know what we're talking about!
TOMMY: I know! Let's call it "blowjobs from a hooker!"
BOBBY: Yeah! So when I ask you in front of your mom if we should go get some "blowjobs from a hooker," she won't be none the wiser!
TOMMY: 23-Skiddoo!
[later]
BOBBY: Hey, let's go get some "blowjobs from a hooker!"
MOM: Oh, you kids! Be careful!
TOMMY: We will!
- Fire for crystal meth. What? I can almost guaran-damn-tee that if I walked up to a drug dealer and asked for fire, he'd hold out his lighter.
- Yahoo for coke. I could be wrong on this one - maybe kids call weed "Lycos" and speed "Hotmail." But I doubt it.
- XTC for Ecstacy. Not objecting to it because I've never heard it called that - on the contrary, that's PHONETICALLY THE SAME DAMNED THING. Jesus blithering CHRIST, next they'll be listing off such "drug codenames" as "MARY WANNA" and "ASS ID."
- Roachies for Rohypnol. Never in my life heard that one. Ever.
- Kibbles and Bits for Ritalin and FUCK YOU, YOU MADE THAT UP. YOU ARE A LIAR AND YOU ARE MAKING THAT UP.
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