Yes, I Have One (supremegoddess1) wrote in metaquotes,
Yes, I Have One

taunting the JWs...

crevette ponders on Jehovah's Witnesses:

The bright side of this weather is that the Jehovah's Witnesses that have started covering the neighborhood again won't be out.

That always intrigues me, actually. Not the fact that the JWs are out in a neighborhood that is at least 85% Scientologist, in a city that is 70% owned by the Church of Scientology (the visual of the two groups trying to convert each other until they're blue in the face--amusing but not realistic since the Scientologists don't go door to door. They just have yard sales and shit--you've never lived till you go to a yardsale and find Church of Scientology tapes, DVDs and bridge materials being cleared out for pennies on the dollar.)

Let me just say that I have every respect for the Jehovah Witnesses. Their faith says they have to do this, fine. I politely tell them: No thank you, No I don't want a Watchtower. Have a nice day. And they thank me politely and go on their way. No problems.

What I always wonder is why in a faith that says that there are a limited number of slots for paradise (I understand that JWs say that there are 144,000 elect that get to go to heaven), why are they going door to door to try and get more people in?

I'm a simple woman with no mad math skilz but even I can see having the advantage of odds on your side. If there's 144,000 slots, and you've got a million people fighting for them, that's a 1.44 in 10 chance that you're going to heaven. I assume those slots are for everyone, living and dead, given that a ressurection seems to a lynchpin of most Christ based faiths.

Wouldn't it make more sense to tighten those odds a little? I don't think I'd be going door to door. I'd be all quiet and silent and "I got a secret... I know something you don't know." and stuff. And when people say, "See you later" I'd be all, "Probably not in the long run. Hee!"

People would have to come to me. I might actually make them beg. (If I were to say "And pay obscene amounts of money" to that, we'd have the Church of Scientology, actually. I wonder if L. Ron had a Jehovah Witness problem in his neighborhood...)

Maybe I'll ask them that next time they come to the door. That could be fun and if the answer is good enough, maybe I'll buy a copy of the Watchtower.

Just to give them false hope, of course.

Heh. No wonder I'm afraid of being hit by lightning. It all comes clear now.

QWP, Context is in Purgatory
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