Keira Knightley is one lucky little bitch, getting to kiss both Orlando Bloom and Johnny Depp. I noticed something funny in my reaction to those kisses, though...
When Elizabeth kissed Will, I reacted the same way I did in the first film: "Hmmmm...lucky girl."
When Elizabeth kissed Jack, the frontal part of my brain reacted with "Ooooh...saucy!" However, my hind brain responded with "Back the fuck off him, bitch!!"
Actually, that's not quite true. The hind brain, being a far more primitive brain and not subject to language, responded more in the vein of "EEEEE!!! Eeeek! Ooook! Ooook! EEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!" *fling poo* *fling poo* *chase competition away* "Eeeeek!" *pee on boy's leg to establish territoriality*
Of course, all this was occurring while I was quietly sitting in a darkened theatre and, in a perfectly civilized manner, happily watching an enjoyable family friendly summer blockbuster.
It's all about controlling the monkey.