Y'know how new parents like to repeatedly lift up their babies (in this case, a 9-month-old) into the air and swing them back down again to make them giggle? "Up Baby Maggie! ... Up Baby Maggie!"
Well, Mummy forgot that the ceiling fan was on, and Baby Maggie was clunked pretty well in the head a few times. Meaning 4 or 5 viscous whacks on my soft skull.
That was around 15 years ago (I'll be 16 in March), and although my mother didn't take me to the doctor's because she was too embarrassed that she had thrown her firstborn daughter's head into a spinning wheel of PVC death-plates, I'm ok.
...I just can't spell 'embarrassed' for the life of me--is there only one 'r'? Goddamn, thanks a lot, Mum.
So next time I post, you can be like, "Oh, there's Maggie...she's the girl whose mother tossed her in a fucking ceiling fan at 9 months."