The email I just sent out to my residents:
Well, guys, it's just about that time. Closing of the dorms for the break is something of an effort, and none of you have ever done it before, so it is in your best interests to come to a hall meeting this week and learn what you need to know. I'm having two because of time conflicts everyone has with any given night:
Please plan to attend one of the following meetings this week:
Wednesday, 8 PM (normal time)
Thursday, 9 PM
There are forms you need and instructions to be given. If you cannot make either of these, it is YOUR responsibility to find me and get the stuff, not mine to track you down. If your inability to follow directions leads directly to me stumbling upon your last second post-finals nookie session, I will not be apologetic, especially if I get fired for using my Master Key to blind myself from the horror.
I know everybody is stressed out, but please try to refrain from throwing yourselves out the kitchen windows to your untimely demise. It creates a lot of extra paperwork for the RA. --Sara