Start from scratch. It was never real. (sevenpapermen) wrote in metaquotes,
Start from scratch. It was never real.
sevenpapermen
metaquotes

I wasn't kidding when I said she's probably the most metaquoteable people I "know."

"There's a puddle in the bathroom that won't go away. it doesn't seem to be coming from the sink or the toliet. we wiped it up before thanksgiving, but it came back over the weekend. on the plus side, it never seems to get any bigger." dreamallday

"So I picked up my Grandma because she...even though we have Thanksgiving at our house, she still cooks most of the food. She's a little concerned because my car is so small and, well, Thanksgiving dinner is pretty big. She's like, 'Where's the stuffing?' and I'm like, 'Ohh, it's down by my feet.' And she just pauses, and says 'Well, just don't pee on it.'

I'm just not sure what I'm supposed to say to that. I mean, I wasn't sure if she thought maybe I don't have any bladder control, or maybe she thought i would really enjoy peeing on Thanksgiving dinner? But anyway, I was just like, 'Ok Grandma!' and that was that. So.." dreamallday

"There's a note on the backdoor reminding the residents of 615 ontario to put their garbage in the dumpster, not outside. It also says that if there's a squirrel in the dumpster we should kick it a few times. I can only assume it is referring to the dumpster, not the squirrel." dreamallday

"Haircuts make me nervous. it's hard to find a nice balance of short hair that doesn't require me to have any sort of girl skills, like being able to operate a round brush at the same time as blow dryer. it's also nice to not ask for short and end up with hair like a fifteen year old shaggy emo boy." dreamallday
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