Imagine my suprise when I go to read The Rime of the Ancient Mariner and I instead find a paragraph stating that Jesus's grandbabies are ruling France, or something. OR that Simon was crucified instead of Jesus, and Jesus is all "SUCKS TO BE YOU, ROMANS! KISS MY PROPAGATING ASS!"
Oh man, I am the worst Christian ever. It'll be the second coming, and Jesus will find the book by my bed, and he'll be all, "Anne, what is THIS?" and I'll be like "It's hilarious! Please don't zap me." but no matter what I say we both know that I'm as good as zapped.
--from the journal of spinooti.