Uhura, send a sub-space email to Starfleet about the emergency here at Casa de Enterprise! Geordi, prepare to jettison the engine nacelles, the warp core, all twenty-three volumes of the Encyclopedia Galactica and Mr. Neelix's astro-asparagus casserole! Worf, arm all photon torpedoes and prepare to fire at the Tholian Web on my command...
...hey, neat venting hole in the basement wall (good work Mr. Worf).
I'll be in my ready room if anyone needs me (especially Jadzia or Kira). Somehow I just don't think the three hours of space sleep I got last night was enough.