Dear Smut Writers (Whom I love dearly and this is in no way meant to be insulting, more of a friendly heads-up),
I realise that not everyone appreciates the use of proper anatomical references in porn. Indeed, "penis" is a seriously deflating term - pardon the pun - if used at an inopportune moment. Obviously, some creative juices are required if an appropriate euphemism is to be found.
For the record, "weary hole," and "slot B" are not appropriate euphemisms. Ever.
Ta ever so,
In the comments, anyotherknight has something to say about misspellings:
My favourites are the ones that swap "bulge" with "bugle". I've got a shirt that says, "I love a rousing call to hunt with my hawtboisecks"