Damanique (damanique) wrote in metaquotes,
Damanique
damanique
metaquotes

I don't like subject titles.

dar_actually handles the knife of sarcasm wonderfully here, and mentions the following:

"I read today that one of the London suicide-bombers had his last meal in a McDonalds. Well, that was very fundamentally Islamic of him, wasn't it? "Right, I'm off to go blow myself up in the name of bringing the secular Anglo-American capitalist Great Satan crumbling to it's knees by killing innocents as my religion expressly forbids, but sitting next to those stoned college students gave me the munchies, so I think I'll have the Big Mac Meal. Yes, extra fries. And to drink? Uhhh, Diet Coke. Thank you. May Allah strike you down and have dogs rape your mother, you filthy America-serving infidel! ...What? Oh, forgot chicken nuggets, sorry..."

Further in the entry, dar_actually comments...

Movies I do NOT want to see;
"The Island" - Michael Bay wonders why nobody went to see his film. I'll tell you why, Michael. You idiot. You gave away The Big Twist™ in the fucking trailers! Thus, removing any need people may have had to see it. What if the trailers for The Matrix had instead of asking "What is the Matrix?" had told us what it is? Eh? Or "Go see Planet Of The Apes! It's actually EARTH all along, can you believe it?!? Coming to cinemas next week, The Empire Strikes Back where Darth Vader turns out to be Luke Skywalker's father!!! I did NOT see that one coming! Or you can go see Vanilla Sky, where Tom Cruise is already dead and everything that's happening to him is a dream he's having in cryogenic suspension. It's kinda like Jacob's Ladder that way, where Tim Robbins is trapped between Heaven and Hell at the moment of his death. Let's see, did I miss any? Oh yeah, look at this trailer for Citizen Kane! Yeah, he says "Rosebud" because that's the name of his sled. The aliens die from bacteria in War Of The Worlds! Maggie shot Mister Burns! To Serve Man is a cookbook! Bruce Willis is a ghost all along! The chick in The Crying Game is a man! Tyler Durden is the other half of Edward Norton's schizophrenic mind! Kevin Spacey is Keyser Söze! Gollum gets the ring back and falls into Mount Doom with it! Norman Bates pretends he's his own mother when he kills people! William Shatner is telling the truth, there IS something on the wing! Jesus, E.T. and Neo all die and come back to life! Snape kills Dumbledore! There, I think that's all of them.
I realize this Coxism was longer than necessary. I just wanted to highlight what a fucking dumbass Michael Bay is for putting spoilers in the trailer of his own movie. Ya dumbass.
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