Being as she had written the letter, and that the letter was good in her sight, she took care to fold it and place it carefully within an envelope; for the POST hath commanded envelopes be used for mail. Having placed the letter within the Holy Envelope, yea, she did commence to write upon the front an address, such that the Sending may be efficient and accurate, and that the letter may make its way to the ordained recipient. Being that the Letter was Addressed, she placed upon the front a Stamp, the holy sticky seal of the POST. And, as the Stamp had been attached, and the POST was appeased, the Letter was placed within the Box of POST, so that its delivery may be swift.
But alas, the POST was angered, for she wrote not a Return Address that the POST might smite her were her offering of a Stamp not sufficient for the delivery of the Letter by the POST. Yea, the POST wished to smite her for breaking the sacred law of Return Address, but the POST could not find her. Thus was the recipient of her Letter smited instead. So it is that the sins of the sender who fails to writeth a Return Address are visited onto the recipient unto the seventh generation.
And thus did the Stamp Collectors move in, and didst take the Stamps from ten thousands of dead letters. For the Stamp Collector is one of the truly faithful of the POST, and receiveth unto themselves the Most Holy relics of sheets of Stamps. Their example is one of Faith, in exchanging vast sums of Gold for the holy Stamps, and their devotion is as great, yea, as of any HP fan.
I swear active_apathy is not the only one I quote. She's just really funny... all of the time.