Jen, I think I'm going to join you in the realms of asexuality. It'd make life easier.
I'll live in bed, with my laptop and wireless internet (which my dad is actually considering getting yay!) and a load of art materials, and end up symbolically marrying a painting or something to show my dedication to the art world. Millions will swoon at my general wonderfulness and good taste in pyjamas but I shall look upon them all with a disdainful eye.
Good plan.