giggly
shuddertime in 
male_dom, speaks about a trip to a sex shop."...[she] grabbed my arm and pulled me towards a sign that read “UPSTAIRS”. Apparently, this is where all the 'interesting things' were. That is what we came here for, after all. I was terrified of the UPSTAIRS. I imagined a man with a twisty moustache and a polygraph machine attaching electrodes to my face and nipples, then quizzing me about my sexual preferences. 'WELCOME TO THE UPSTAIRS,' he would say. Then he would smack me with a stick and send pictures of it to my family. I made every effort to seem unaffected by the ascent. I failed."
as well as...
"...you’d see 12 half-hearted porno movies or a pink felt-covered book with a title like 'HOW TO GET HER OFF IN 10 MINUTES'. It would invariably feature a blonde woman with collagen lips and a constipated facial expression that I’m sure was meant to convey 'sexual ecstasy'."
