Someone crossposted a very explicit, very kinky personal ad in a community which does not allow personal ads.

Anal plugs
Bondage (light)
Bondage (heavy, day-and-night)
Masturbation, penetration
The occasional hard bite
Being lent
Getting laid
Chores and serving as a maid
Exhibitionism, beating
Controlled bathroom use and eating
Cattle prods! Anal play
Lots of sex, both straight and gay
And of course I would require you to shave
If that sounds good to you
Come on and join the queue
To be my slave
Be my slave
Be my slave