Me: Me Bond, James Bond.
Me: -- BEST FANFICTION CROSSOVER SLASH EVAR.
Me: Me Bond will have to snap over Me Tarzan's death after their frisky rompings.
Me: And then go all revenge-mode.
Me: And then a Mary Sue can come in and make it all better.
Me: The twist is? At the end he murders her, because now he's gay.
...
Me: It will end on a "Dun dun DUUUUUUUN" note.