What do you do when the Dove Corporation calls? Well that depends.. which Dove Corporation are we talking about?
Thursday, June 09, 2005
Got a strange call today.
“Hello, Mrs. [Insert name here]. My name is Mark from the Dove Corporation.”
Dove Corporation? Hmm. That’s either the soap bar people, the ice cream bar people, or the Holy Spirit people. One the off chance that it was the ice cream bar people, I let him continue.
“Now, let me assure you I’m not selling anything…”
Damn. No ice cream.
“…but if you’re like most folks, you’re concerned with the quality of entertainment for children ages five to nine. Would you say that describes you, Mrs. [Insert name here]?” Definitely Holy Spirit people.
“Look, I’m not interested in taking any surv…”
“But.. but…” You could tell he was flipping the script pages rather quickly. “Don’t you want to cleanse children’s entertainment?” He actually used those words. I was so astonished I had to repeat them.
“Cleanse children’s entertainment?”
“Yes!”
“Fuck, no!”
*click*