Set it down on a table beside a firm, dry straw hat. Sit down opposite from the soggy hat, turn a chair backwards, and sit in it with your arms crossed, leaning forward.
"Look, you've been a good hat, and it's not quite fair to call you a disappointment. But as you can see, I've got at least one other hat that isn't imitating cooked spaghetti. Now, I'm not going to tell you what to do, but perhaps you might consider shaping up."
Then pull out a handful of loose crushed straw from behind your back and place it nonchalantly on the table.
"All of our actions have consequences, dear. I'll let you decide where we go from here."
Leave the hat alone for the night.
It'll be bone-dry by morning, guaranteed.
scott_lynch again
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EMPOWERING ACTION GARB ACTIVATED!
fieryphoenix laments Superhero Privilege: I'm a little jealous of how their leader can run around in a sports bra, bulgy tights, and a…
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Remember all those Fanficrants about what your Avatar OC wasn't allowed to bend?
joe_pwnz_pete's warning about headcanons and assumption brought back such memories: People are salty that they made assumptions about…
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cue piano music
(Anonymous): I love the whole "contrasting dicks" thing as well. Like "the other man was thinner, but longer" Like why…
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EMPOWERING ACTION GARB ACTIVATED!
fieryphoenix laments Superhero Privilege: I'm a little jealous of how their leader can run around in a sports bra, bulgy tights, and a…
-
Remember all those Fanficrants about what your Avatar OC wasn't allowed to bend?
joe_pwnz_pete's warning about headcanons and assumption brought back such memories: People are salty that they made assumptions about…
-
cue piano music
(Anonymous): I love the whole "contrasting dicks" thing as well. Like "the other man was thinner, but longer" Like why…