Maya, Lady of the Dark Path (maya_slash) wrote in metaquotes,
Maya, Lady of the Dark Path
maya_slash
metaquotes

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I haven't thought of posting this on this comm, but after a while, I decided it would do wonderfully. It's wonderful example of lightandashes's beta-ing skills *hugs her and smooches her*.
A few weeks ago, I was flamed (geh, as if that doesn't happen to the regular yaoi fan, XD) and lightandashes decided to beta the flame:



So, this is the flame:

FUCK OFF~~~~~

YOU AR EBULLSHIT I HATE YOU AND I WIsh you sUCK!!!!!!! FUCK YOU!!


And this is the wonderful reply by the even more wonderful lightandashes:

Hello. Maya's beta here, and before I get started on this comment you so kindly took time out of your day to leave (presumably out of your hourly masturbation session, given the amount of mistakes I see in one glance), I feel I should warn you that I am a tough beta. I've been told that people stopped writing after I beta'ed one of their stories, as I found so many errors.

Let's continue, yes?


FUCK OFF~~~~~

YOU AR EBULLSHIT I HATE YOU AND I WIsh you sUCK!!!!!!! FUCK YOU!!

Sigh. Typical flame, yes: rampant abuse of caps lock/shift key, horrid misuse of spacebar, blatant lack of knowledge regarding basic insults, terrifying punctuation abuse, and worst of all, begging for a blowjob.

First: Tildas (~) are not punctuation to be used at the ends of words or sentences. They belong over letters, such as ñ or ã, or in mathematics when necessary.

Second: DO NOT ABUSE THE CAPS LOCK/SHIFT KEYS. EVER. This offense is punishable by the stinging bitchslaps of a thousand weeping writers.

Third: Punctuation is meant to be used sparingly, and only when truly necessary. Failure to use proper punctuation is an offense punishable by being bitchslapped and used as a horse.

Fourth: You attempted to suggest that she is, I believe you said, "bullshit." You do not know exactly what she is made of, but you would be safe in assuming that she is a human being, the same as you are. You could have said that she was full of bullshit, or something along those lines, but you did not.

Fifth: You're being extremely repetitive. Two uses of the phrase "fuck off" in a simple two-line flame is ridiculous as well as hilarious. Thanks for the laugh, but please rent a brain.

Sixth: Desperate pleas for sexual pleasure do not belong in flames. I am surprised and dismayed that you do not already know this.

In closing, I must insist that until you can properly insult someone, you refrain from doing so. After all, it's not very sporting for your opponent: they're engaging the unarmed in a battle of wits.


The flame can be found here and the reply here
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