And The Clocks Were Striking Thirteen (_redpanda_) wrote in metaquotes,
And The Clocks Were Striking Thirteen
_redpanda_
metaquotes

I think I'm in love

At this point, let us discuss my stepmother Mavis. Mavis is not made of the stuff that my father and I are made of, which might best be described as a good-natured chocolate shell over a heart of purest marshmallow. Mavis, on the other hand, is kin to pioneer women and Civil War field medics. Mavis can and has castrated pigs and performed C-sections on dying guinea pigs. Mavis is tough. If we are ever trapped in a zombie movie, Dad and I will be casualties of the first ten frames, but Mavis will last to the bitter end, sealing up zombie bites with superglue, delivering a couple of babies along the way, and take an unbelievable number of the living dead out with her right before the credits.

-- ursulav -- the entire story is here, but be warned: it contains both poodles AND maggots!
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