crimson butterflies are insane (dragonling) wrote in metaquotes,
crimson butterflies are insane
dragonling
metaquotes

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bean_shadow muses on how a Hummer salesman makes his pitch after seeing a Hummer covered with Dale Earnhart Jr stuff:

"What's money? Would you put a price on having an abnormally large penis? Yeah, they are expensive but think of the future. People don't do that enough. But you are a smart man who can see into the future. And what you see, and what I see as well, is a man who will get another raise and probably a better job because your boss or future employer will know you have a big penis."
"I never thought of it that way."
"May I ask you what your favorite sport is?"
"I like racing. NASCAR."
"Well then I'm glad you came here when you did. All the big penis men in the racetrack parking lot make fun of you and your small Honda. You want to show them. You want Dale Earnhart Jr. himself to see you in that Hummer and think, 'Man, I never thought anybody could have a large a penis as me but that guy does.'"
"Yeah."
"So what do you think?"
"I'LL BUY ONE!"
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