Stripenfoxen (terminal_frost) wrote in metaquotes,
Stripenfoxen
terminal_frost
metaquotes

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Best. Letter. Ever.

"Dear Mr. Riddle,

We regret to inform you that you are sterile. As an evil megalomaniac, you have no desire to reproduce; moreover, the only sexual feelings you have are triggered by sadism.

In the event that one did, somehow, become pregnant with your child, we are sure that you would do the wrong thing and kill her instantly. If the child was born, we are sure you would take a cue from the rulers of the Ottoman Empire and strangle it with a silk cord.

Sincerely,
Canon"

dryerase in deleterius
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