Little challenges or bouts of curiosity make every mundane act a bit more interesting. I was invading the Marriot bathroom the other week and as I was about to enthusiastically engage the porcelain effigy with some ureal erosion, I thought to myself, "Can I make this automatic-flush urinal flush while still pissing into it?"
Mind you, without making a mess. I hate when people make messes. My aim is superior. So I began my thing, and I started moving further and further away from my white friend until I was maybe 5 feet away, piss flowing in a beautiful arc like a golden rainbow of sterile kidney-rejected joy. And then it happened.
FWOOOOSHHHHHHHHH. And I was still going. The pressure began to lessen, like that of Bush on progressing stem-cell research after his defeat of Kerry, and I began to approach the confused appliance. I was done. I walked away from that urinal with a distinct satisfaction that I gave it multiple flushgasms in one session. This is why I'm a real man.
*still in fits of giggles*