After much research, I have come to a conclusion.
During the past 400 years, there have been far too many artists. Too many artists who were influenced by the works of previous artists who were influenced by the works of previous artists who were influenced by the works of previous artists who were influenced by the works of previous artists who were influenced by the works of previous artists who were influenced by the works of previous artists who were influenced by the works of previous artists. It would have been infinitely more beneficial for these people to have become doctors. Or farmers. Or soldiers. Or vending machine repair men, or zoo keepers, or musicians, or grocery store clerks, or pastry chefs, or carpenters, or magicians, pilots, politicians, fishermen, gynecologists, hairdressers, members of the French, German, or Italian mafia, or unicorns. But no, they all decided to eat their paint, have hallucinations, record said hallucinations onto canvas, and sell said recorded hallucinations to the masses for ridiculous amounts of cash. And then some other wonderful geniuses decided to record all of these backdoor shenanigans in a book the size of the Yellow Pages, sell THAT to the masses for a hundred and twenty seven bucks, and then cram it down our throats at eight thirty in the morning while simultaneously causing us chronic back and/or shoulder problems. I am now on a holy crusade to find a successful curse/spell/formula that will raise the dead, so I can bring all of these dead white European artists back to life, and then run them all down with a bus coated in arsenic. So, to all of you dead artists. To Mondrian, to Moore, to Durer, Dali, Picasso, Monet, Gericault, Degas, Goya, Kandinsky, Gropius, Rietveld, Brancusi, and the rest of you pinheads whose work I carry on my back, force down my throat, and can't seem to remember no matter how I try, I have this to say.
People all over the world are starving because you didn't become agriculturists. People are dying of horrible horrible diseases that might have been curable had you become doctors. Because you didn't become scientists, we still don't have rocket cars. You are the reason that students have no money!! You are the reason that hundreds of students will develop a hunched back!! You are the reason I am freaking out and breaking into tears in the bathroom!! You are the reason America has lost its way!! I BLAME YOU!!
And YOU ARE THE ONES WHO ARE THE BALL LICKERS!!!!