This reminds me of one of my LJ pet peeves: the promise of bitchiness that doesn't quite deliver.
Watch out! I'm about to get bitchy. Yeah, I'm bitching. I'm ranting, even. Stand back or you'll get burnt by my Bitch Ray! Cause I'm bitching. Any minute now I'm gonna drop the bomb, and you'll all hate me. Are you ready for bitchiness? If you're not, you'd better not friend me, cause if there's one thing I do, it's bitch. I can't help it, I've got to vent. I'm telling it like it is! I am brutally honest. I don't hold back. I let it all hang out. Bitchin'. That's right. It's coming. Any second now. No one will be safe from my internet thrashing! I'm going to scorch the earth! Bitching in 3-2-1...
Okay, guys, please don't jaywalk. You might get hit by a car and that would be a shame.
So, so, I bet you hate me now? Huh? Yeah, that's right, I said it! Jaywalking is bad. It's not safe, much like my scathing journal entries. I bet if you met me in person, you'd beat me with a sack of oranges! Well direct your hate mail here.
-- jess_d_ripper on JF