Herman the Jazzmahn (jazzmahn) wrote in metaquotes,
Herman the Jazzmahn

First post and all that...

In customers_suck by project_mayhem_ -- Priceless

Now, through advanced calculations and studies, I have made the following discovery. Sit down and keep some toilet paper handy. During the holiday season, things get very busy. Things get very busy because people buy things. But when people buy ALL of something, there is no more. Which leads to the brain-sploding conclusion- WE RUN OUT OF THINGS DURING CHRISTMAS TIME. OH! OH! Wait- there’s more- grab something solid for this one- because WE RUN OUT OF THINGS- we might NOT BE ABLE TO GET MORE. Almost done picking up your squishy brain bits? Prepare your bladder for imminent release- THIS. HAPPENS. EVERY. YEAR. HOW MANY Christmases have you been through to know better? Now, having explained our current inventory situation, you can yelp and scream and twitch like someone put a cattle prod where the short and curlies grow- maybe it’ll work like some kind of rain dance and bottles of wine will fall from the sky. But it would f--- up your car and they’d break anyway- so A.) You can deal with it, B.) Go somewhere else, or C.) Do A and B together
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