a small, duck-billed platypus (wendywoowho) wrote in metaquotes,
a small, duck-billed platypus
wendywoowho
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On Shopping For "Feminine Supplies"

cmpriest on shopping for 'feminine supplies'.



Off I went to the mall to be thoroughly bewildered by the dazzling array of cottony products available. ... I eventually picked my Mary Kay pink, fruity-smelling box [so my crotch could smell like CANDY, and thereby lure unsuspecting children to their doom] ... plus a candy bar, a small teddy bear, a tube of lipstick and a Teen magazine.

...

If anyone asks, your house was flooded and you're trying to dry out your collection of historical finger puppets -- and you thought to yourself, "Hey, I bet some of those feminine hygiene products would do the trick." So now you're going to go home and stuff those puppets 'til they swell to the size of mittens. Yeah, that's the ticket. Or else they're for your mom. Or your sister.
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