June 16th, 2014

Bear

Why Life is Not Like a Role-Playing Game

jimhines meditates on how real life differs from RPGs:
Game Master (GM): When you try to print out your document, you find that the color printer is jammed. What do you do?
Random Computer User from 4th Floor (RCU): I open up the printer to see if I can find the paper.
GM: (Makes a few dice rolls) You see a bit of white trapped among the ink cartridges and the fuser. I’d like to remind you that you don’t have the Repair Printer skill.
RCU: I’ll use my intelligence statistic. I grab the fuser and yank it out.
GM: (Rolls the dice) You burn yourself.
RCU: I try again.
GM: (Rolls his/her eyes) You sustain two points of damage, but you finally get the fuser out.
RCU: I yank the paper out.
GM: (Makes another die roll) It tears, leaving an inaccessible strip of paper jammed in the fuser. You also notice that there’s two more sheets of paper jammed in the printer, one on the right side, and one beneath the ink cartridges.
RCU: Can I cast “Summon Computer Technician”?
GM: Make your spellcasting roll.
Context decided to cast Healing on the printer instead. QWP.