August 21st, 2011

star wars AT-AT headdesk
  • tzikeh

Katrimae the librarian fails to find a non-existent book

There I was sitting at the circulation desk, checking things in and out and doing a little light reference work and really, let's face it, mainly daydreaming and waiting for my shift to end.

Two regular patrons walked up to the desk to check out their movies: The Fighter and Iron Man and some Reese Witherspoon thing (and no offense to any Reese Witherspoon fans out there but so help me, I can never tell one of her movies from another). While I was getting their DVDs ready the woman asked me if I could find a book for her. Sure, I said. Part of the job, I said.

"I really need a book on the FEMA concentration camps they're building down the Interstate," she said. (emphasis mine)

Ah. And by "Ah," I mean that I thought, "Holy bejeebers." But I dutifully searched the catalog and told them that I was really sorry but we didn't seem to have anything on that subject because unfortunately our collection of batshit insane conspiracy theories is just a bit on the skimpy side.

I didn't say that. Wanted to. Didn't.

They both nodded a bit sadly and he said, "Yeah, we didn't really expect to find anything. THEY don't want anyone to know about it." I apologized and said that if I came across anything, I'd be sure to set it aside for them. And off they went to watch Reese Witherspoon and, presumably, plan their escape from the FEMA camps.

Maybe there's a hidden track somewhere in Sweet Home Alabama that explains how to rise up against the government. I should probably watch it sometime.
QWP. Context is unavailable due to the information blackout field.
  • diea

(no subject)

autumnjedigirl attempts to interpret cat language:

The cat just chirped at my zipped-up dance bag while climbing all over it. I assume she was saying one of two things:

1) Hey, why can't I get inside this dammit thing?
2) Open yourself so I can be inside you dammit thing!

Or, it may have been both. I don't speak cat, y'know.

Context is flocked, quipped, and quoted in its entirety.
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