April 28th, 2009

Seriously

Annoyingly annointed?

tamnonlinear, commenting on a post about the reforming of Christian band Creed, discloses the reason for the long delay:

It took them that long to build up the oil reserves needed for the frontman to slather himself properly before performances. The oil is made from an extract of bitter virgin's tears, and takes a while to age properly.

Quoted with permission. Context can take you higher, but won't.
ROFL

If I Only Had a...

triplemare is experiencing the joys of womanhood:

(sung to the tune of If I Only Had A Brain)

OOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.......

I could while away the hours, destroying pretty flowers
thinking 'bout the rain...
While my boobs are sorely aching,
and my family's likely quaking
It's PMS time again!

My uterus is cramping, my napkins quickly dampening
my head is full of pain...
With the angst I am feeling,
you prob'bly should be kneeling,
It's PMS time again!

Ohhhh, IIIIIIII could tell you why, PMS is. Such. A. Bore.
And IIIIII could think of things I never thunk before
And then I'd think, wow! My twat is sore!

I have to go a-shoppin', as my period's a-hoppin
I'm all out o'supplies
I will terrify the shoppers with my cart all full of Whoppers
and Charmin double-sized!

QWP.
[ books ] book love

Because I love America.

mylaptopisevil: God why the hell won't the PC liberals like Rush leave good American hunters alone. This nation was founded by whatever they want to keep active, and Rush with his liberal mindset is ruining it. What is this, socialism?

lovessacrifice: What is this, socialism?

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

mylaptopisevil: It means everything I don't want to support god damnit.

Context is pretty sure Hell has frozen over.

Really don't plagiarize a paper for your religion class

ladysisyphus has to explain this to her students:

we will catch you.

Why am I so certain? Because we are scholars of religion. We study groups that call themselves things like 'People of the Book'. We prove our arguments by running back to documents whose ancientness you can't imagine, picking through dozens of translations and codices and fragments. We care about things like word frequency statistics and whether a character is written on or above the line. Even the most secular, practice-oriented, modern among us has surely spent hours, days, months, years on one text. And if by chance we don't care about the texts themselves, we care about the people who care about the texts -- which, by some commutative property, means we eventually care about the texts.

We write entire papers on single words. You do not want to mess with us.

Context lays out the consequences, which neither she nor they will enjoy.

QWP and elaboration.
the_dark_side's Eve 6 Yoda

And You're Going to LIKE IT.

evercourant comments on a post in rahmbamarama about being called to Rahm's office:


Lololol you guys this is the new "Hannibal ad portas". Mothers are going to cross their arms and look sternly at their kids and say "IF YOU DON'T EAT YOUR VEGETABLES, YOU'RE GOING TO BE CALLED INTO A MEETING WITH WHITE HOUSE CHIEF OF STAFF RAHM EMANUEL." and the kids will shut the hell up and eat those fucking vegetables.


QWP from a locked post. Context is now eating vegetables that don't even belong to them.
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