It's all about the pink-to-penis ratio!
I went to dish up food, thanking my lucky stars that I had precisely three clean bowls left. After dishing up the twoyr-old's first I moved on to the boys'. It just so happened that they recieved between them one green bowl of mac-n-cheese and one pink bowl of mac-n-cheese, which is a horrible coincidence since that pink-to-penis ratio is apparently entirely too high. They began to argue. And it got loud. Sensing a potential teaching moment, I intervened.
RB: *removes both bowls from table* You may both have your bowls back as soon as you can reach an agreement on them.
Boys: MOOOO-OOOOOM!
RB: I will help you if you need it or in ten minutes, whichever happens first. If you need me, just ask.
Boys: *argue quietly for ten minutes*
RB: Okay, so you guys haven't reached a compromise, huh?
Boys: He says... NO! HE says...
RB: That's enough. I'll just go wash another bowl for you. No more arguing. Understood?
Boys: Yes :)
So, since I knew one of them would be getting up to gt himself another dish at some point, thereby creating more dishes for me anyway, I decided my own terms. I washed another pink bowl.
They ate their food. Their balls didn't fall off.
(QWP, but that's the whole story.)