December 4th, 2008


Because when doesn't midget porn lead to embarrassment?

turi_mackinnon: I can be a total ass sometimes. This afternoon I had a funeral to attend, my great aunt. I didn't know her very well, but she reminded me of my grandfather. The funeral was at 2pm, I wasn't gonna get out of work until about the same time and I had to work nearly an hour away. My mother told me it would be ok if I came straight from work, even if I were dirty. I wasn't very comfortable with this but figured it would be better to show up dirty than to not show up at all. So, I managed to get out of work by 1:40 and arrived at the church by 2:10. As I got out of the truck I nearly forgot to take my PDA for work off my hip. So I tossed it into the passenger seat and walk into the church. Of coarse things had already started and was not nearly as stealthy as I would have liked to have been. But I find my family and take a seat. About 15 minutes later I remember I have my cell phone in my pocket and turned on. At this point I start praying it doesn't go off. Wouldn't you know it not a minute after I remember the damn phone it goes off. Now I could have just apologized and moved on, but the ring tone didn't help. I had recieved a picture message, and the ring tone is from Monty Python and the Holy Grail, when the grave digger comes around yelling "Bring out your dead." So here I am at a funeral with a room full of people I either haven't seen in a long time or have never seen and someone decides to send me pics of midget porn. Needless to say this may have been my most embarassing moment EVER.

QWP - Context

The Story of KYLIE AND λ and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Smell

slammerkinbabe had an epic encounter last night in her and λ's apartment.
7:45: The scent has grown exponentially stronger and Kylie and λ still have not the foggiest clue what is causing it. By now it appears that turpentine has sired rival love children with rotten apples and rotten oranges, both of whom have amassed armies of rats fresh from the garbage to wage bloody battle inside the walls. Judging from the smell, there are no survivors.
9:40: The house smells of vanilla and mandarin-cranberry and cinnamon and nutmeg and chocolate and turpentine and rotten apples and rotten oranges and cat puke that Basil horked up after eating a portion of the fake Christmas tree while Kylie was MacGyvering a dispersion unit for fauxpourri. Kylie asks λ despairingly if it isn't okay, on the whole, or at least much better? λ shakes her head in confusion; her nose has thrown in the towel and has stopped sending specific signals to her brain beyond "IT SMELLS IN HERE."
Context knows this isn't over. And is worth reading in entirety.
Call Me Sir Goddamnit!


misscrystal in ohnotheydidnt responding to an article quote claiming everyone in the black community does not approve of interracial dating.

WRONG. In the black community, we don't approve interracial dating if the non-black person in the relationship is ugly. I mean that's like driving to the other side of town just to get a Big Mac when there's a Chick-fil-A across from your house

Context is craving a chicken sandwich now.

(Edit: I fail at html codes)
  • Current Mood
    amused amused