September 9th, 2008

agent may is unimpressed

Reasons to grow a beard and own a van, No. 66523

So we have this creepy kid living next door. He seems to want to be our friends. I don't want to be friends with a creepy little kid, and wish his parents would teach him to fear and mistrust strangers like they ought to. Really, why the hell did I bother growing this beard if little children don't think I'm going to shove them in my van and do horrible things to them?

Maybe it's because I don't have a van anymore...

--allanc, here

sassandthecity and kaylajoy21 commenting on Jessica Simspon.

sassandthecity: Pregnant? No. A skanky version of Laura Ingalls Wilder? Most definitely.
kaylajoy21: Laura Ingalls Wilder just rolled over in her grave.
sassandthecity: Please, Laura Ingalls Wilder has been rolling and rolling ever since she saw what Melissa Gilbert did to  her mouth.
kaylajoy21:This just took it to a whole other level. I mean, comparing JS to Laura Ingalls Wilder? Have you NO shame!?!?!?!

link (open, on ONTD)

Slither 2: The Soupmaking

Once again, the Giant Bed has provided me with the chance to witness some great sleeptalking. It's early in the morning and I was already half-awake and laying in bed trying to convince myself to either get up or fall asleep. There's thrashing from the other half of the bed where K and M are snuggling, and I look over in time to see M start nudging K.

K: Wha... hmm?
M: Get up! Get up!
K: *whining* Why?
M: You gotta get them off. Get the slugs off me!
K:'re asleep.
M: No! The slugs are going to make me into stew...
K: *rolls over* Go'sleep.
M: *muttering fades out into very faint singing as he curls up again* Stew for meeee... stew for yoooouuuu...

Context is trying to find a really big pot.
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
Oh God Oh God We're All Going To Die

It's The End of he World As We Know It...

seanan_mcguire is concerned about the Large Hadron Collider firing tonight.

So if tomorrow we're all reduced to component atoms, stardust, and the sound of voices screaming "I told you so!" into the voice, well...

I regret nothing.

amberley succeeds in reassuring her

If it's more entertaining, imagine it's a Large Hadrosaur Collider, in which dinosaurs are jammed together to see what new fabulous beasts emerge.

seanan_mcguire: ...that is more entertaining. GIMME.

Context isn't the only one concerned.
for Ana

(no subject)

if you buy condoms you're supposed to just be really proud of em so people will appreciate that you like having sex. when they ask you if you want a bag yell "FOR THESE CONDOMS I'M GONNA USE TO HAVE SEX WITH LATER? NO I SHALL CARRY THEM OUT ON TOP OF MY HEAD!"

or you could tell them you'd prefer to wear them out, like when you get new shoes.

nationofamanda, here

diatryma's foreign-language teacher is full of awesome.

I had been looking up Chinese names for a while, mostly floral things, but I wanted something a little more... okay, a botanical name is fine, but even then I'd want something like 'bell pepper' or 'poplar' rather than 'graceful lily'. I ended up requesting 'mad scientist' if possible, and something that sounded right if not.

The teacher spent two weeks putting together names for us, trying to match our own names as closely as possible. I am Ke Qianling, though I don't know where to put the spaces and my computer refuses to do tone markings. [...]

"Qian", she said, means "intelligent", and "ling" is for "victory".

My Chinese name translates to BWAHAHA.

Context is practicing her laugh.