July 29th, 2008

boo

(no subject)

"I'm so sorry that me expressing my thoughts and opinions has your panties in a wad and scrunched up your ass. I am deeply, profoundly sorry that it's so very uncomfortable because your head is in the way."

elorie thinks that context is doing too much yoga.
sp33k English

Vinnysbigmouth refuses to celebrate a co-workers win of a $25 gift certificat

  vinnysbigmouth says in response to a co-worker's desire to celebrate:

Me: No. If you’ll look here on this piece of paper, I tried to find a number that would quantify the degree to which I am not doing any of that, but I ran out of room for the decimal places. Suffice it to say that the only way I’m doing any of what you just described is if you kill me, shove your hand up my ass and use me as a puppet. Then we’ll talk. But as it stands, if there is life in my body and no hand up my ass, this is not happening.

Full post here - worth the click!!

springtime the pony

(no subject)

abarero doesn't read e-books:

I think this should be the prime reason that no matter what happens in the future, we need paper-made books for throwing purposes.

Whether it's "OMG WHAT THE SHIT DID I JUST READ!?!" angry throwing, as I'm sure many a copy of
Twilight has been used for or even "Oh noes! Intruder in my house! *bashes them with Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix* which hasn't happened to my knowledge, but in the event there is an intruder in my apartment- that book will be my weapon of choice.

Context is defenstrated.
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
Hurley oh shit

Dear Midwestistan:

When news local to you over the last 3 months has included a fatal bridge collapse, devastating flooding, and Republican primaries, why is it that you have to freak out and flail over an earthquake of 'moderate' magnitude happening nearly 400 miles from me?

Seriously. It's just an earthquake. 5.8 is not big.
The sky did not try to suck my stuff off of the face of the planet, as happens to someone within 400 miles of you every goddamned tornado season. And sure, earthquakes are unpredictable save based on geologic history that suggests that you get a big one (like '89 or '06) roughly every 85 years.
roughly every 85 years.
You can't move your shit either way: the earth will worry your house around like a terrier with a rat, the tornado will (or won't) hit your place and pull the roof off.
One you have a few hours' warning. The other you can kind of notice before it gets to the point of lethality.

So what's the big deal about an earthquake twice a century, when you guys have tornadoes, every damned year, in a place that gets so many you nickname it 'Tornado Alley'?

I just don't get the lack of proportion here. UPDATE: on reflection, I do get some of it. California is LONG and BIG. It's about 400 miles from my door to the earthquake that just happened. Think of it this way, maybe, Midwestistan: worrying about my experience of an earthquake that struck LA is like calling me in Chicago to ask me if I'd weathered the tornado that hit St. Louis: same distance, same possibility of correlary damage at such a distance.

Love, and see you in a week,
colubra

Context is f-locked and qwp.

warhol

(no subject)

Over at bad_rpers_suck, beardedtroll on when Villains Go Woobie:

"It wasn't *our* fault that the deity in question was more focused on his sappy romance with a townsperson and their unborn baby (*gag*).


'I will call him Mini-Me: the destroyer of toys, the bane of teddybears, the despoiler of nappies, He Who Crawls Just a Little More Quickly Than You Give Him Credit For'"


QWP, context is here and ranty.