February 17th, 2008

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About the creative ways of killing a rat in the kitchen


"So we had an intruder in our kitchen just before the Chinese New Year, and it's a rat. Because it's the Year of the Rat, my family decided not to kill it until the first few days are over.

Turns out the rat is pretty damn smartass. It avoided our nicely-set up trap with barbecued pork and managed to chew his way through our backdoor into our kitchen AGAIN.

So one fine morning (really early morning to be exact), my grandfather, mother and uncle saw it having a feast in our kitchen. (WHY WERE THEY AWAKE SO EARLY!!) And the most cracky things happened after that.

My grandfather took a hammer. I mean, trying to kill a rat with a hammer? You will end up slamming that thing into your foot more than anything. Ok, it escaped. Never mind.

An hour later, it appeared again! You think the hammer was bad enough? This time, my grandfather took a SAW. And my uncle took an UMBRELLA.

OH GOD. I LAUGHED TILL TEARS CAME OUT OF MY EYES.

A HAMMER. A SAW. AN UMBRELLA. I have no idea what my family was thinking about, but this sounds like a crack family comedy.

Just one of the special ways in trying to kill a rat.

And P.S. It escaped again."

That was aureril's whole post. f-locked. QWP. So how would you kill the rat?
francesca woodman

(no subject)

theohsocurlyone sums up why Brits don't remake American tv shows like Heroes and Lost:

"That's because we're British. The whole premise is that they're heroes; they're big and hugely impressive, unbelievably gorgeous and just epic in general, and thus quintessentially American. If we made our own version of Heroes it would be a small group of slightly embarassed admin assistants whose powers accidentally resurface when they shoot tea out of their fingertips, or use their abilities to give themselves mind-blowing, and kind of unrealistic, orgasms.

Plus, in a Lost-style scenario, none of us would have a clue how to handle a gun. And we'd stay the fuck away from rainforests with bears in them."

qwp, context is a little bit awkward, but makes a damn fine cup of tea.