November 7th, 2007

Caution (too-)well-learned

active_apathy is cautious on the Fifth of November:
Also, I think I almost missed the Gunpowder Plot references in Iron Council, like when [spoiler] and [spoiler] go to [spoiler] the [spoiler] of New [Spoiler]zon, in a similar plan to when [spoiler] posed as [spoiler]'s [spoiler], so that they could [spoiler] their way into the House of [Spoilers] and [spoiler] it.

(...you may have been on the Internets too long when you're careful about spoilers for the Powder Treason.)
Context remembers, remembers... Formatting as in the original.
hojxi-garden_of_aloe
  • bibsy

(no subject)

theanapirate reflects on Jurassic Park.

"
When that dude got eaten in the bathroom, it freaked me the fuck out forever. I mean, it was the bathroom."

Context Here: http://community.livejournal.com/ohnotheydidnt/17171956.html?thread=1980211444#t1980211444

(Sorry for the lack of a link; LJ isn't cooperating with me today.)

fiddledragon has a simple request

Dear Faculty,

When you borrow 15th-century necromancy manuals and then do not return them, it makes the librarians nervous. At least have creepy tomes of ancient magic properly renewed so that we theoretically know where they are.

Thank you.

(Flocked, QWP. That's the whole post, but context is racking up heavy fines.)
gothic wondering

sionnain has been amening...

In other news, I sang a lot over the last two days. I told K. that I've sung enough Amens to get this atheist, Satanist, kinky poly bi girl into heaven. THAT IS A LOT OF AMENS, OKAY. I don't believe in God, but if there turns out to be one, I will tell said deity "Yes, yes, I know, you frown upon my lifestyle but the AMENS, dude."

Context is a star, spice rack, and bullwhip. (flocked, QWP)
  • ems

The last Allsorts-related metaquote ever (probably). I promise.

shaysdays decides to see what all the fuss is about...

DEAR GOD I BOUGHT SOME AND THEY ARE GAWD AWFUL. MY MOUTH JUST RAN AWAY FROM THE SHEER HORROR. I HAVE NO MOUTH AND I MUST BLOG.

Context is is cleaning its teeth for the seventh time here, locked but QWP. Also forgive the tangent but some of you asked me to collect the saga together in one public place, so here you go: allsortssrsbzns.
joan holloway roses

(no subject)

Found in fanficrants:

someblazingstar: "I don't get the need some fans have to try to force every character into their ideal of What is Sexy - if somebody doesn't already fit your standards of hot, how hard is it to find another fandom with someone who does? It's fandom, not marriage."

vulgarweed: "Imagine that in divorce court.

'Your Honor, he knows only hairless, willowy, bishie-boys like the ones in yaoi manga turn me on. But he wouldn't binge and purge and wax his whole body for me, and no matter how hard I pegged him, he just wouldn't cry that single tear for me.'

'Wait, whaaat? And you want alimony?'"

Context has five scars surrounding its abused anus.
illiad spoiler // kateshort

(no subject)

cleolinda's mother is not forced to Mominate for a refund:

Some ten or fifteen minutes later, Gerald arrives. It turns out that he’s head of—all of Sears at this mall, I believe? My mother describes him as a very stately, polished man; the way she did his voice, I immediately started imagining Laurence Fishburne, and I suggest you do so as well. “How Can I Help You, Ma’am?” asks Gerald.

My mother explains the situation. Again. She shows him the paperwork where, clearly circled, is the passage about hooking up the TV to the primary input cable, which the delivery men did not do, even though she had paid $65 for them to do so. Didn’t call, came even before business hours, woke her daughter up, leave in carton, etc.

Gerald scrutinizes the papers. “It Does Indeed Say That. You Should Be Reimbursed… I Agree. Did You Not Receive A Rebate Form?”

“They didn’t give me one, no,” says my mother.

“We Will Have To Rectify That Situation.” He turns to the original salesman that she consulted when she came in; the original salesman may or may not have wet himself. “We… we can’t find a rebate form.”

Gerald stares down at the salesman from on high. There may be scorn in his inscrutable gaze, my mother’s not sure. “Why Did You Not Just Put A Credit On Her Card?”

“We—can do that?”

“Do That.” He turns to my mother and says, “Please, Let Me Know If I Can Be of Any Further Assistance.” And then Gerald re-ascends into the heavens.

QWP, context has a Greek Chorus of terrified salesmen bowing to her.
Adam Tease

Cheeseburger, Cheeseburger, Cheeseburger

mejoff comments on an cat-less cheeseburger macro in cat_macros:

Clever, clever enough to circumvent the rules in my book, but I fear I must join the chorus of: Jesus Fucking Christ on a reticulated cunt-bike that must be the vilest looking cheeseburger I've ever clapped eyes on and i live in Oxford, the ultimate home of the 3am kebab-van monstrosity.

Context knows a bad burger when he sees it.
Sylar Cue Evil Laughter

[info]fiareynne , of Heroes fandom, has a few sage words about 'shipping for Our Mister Kring

YOUNG LOVE STINKS ...

My personal thoughts: Um, Mr. Kring, sir? Hi. That could possibly have something to do with the fact that even most of the non-slashers -- at least among my friends -- pretty much accept Hiro/Ando as canon. They couldn't really be much more 'doing it' unless you actually showed them doing it.



Context thinks that making it official would be swell, too.
  • Current Music
    "Life" (NBC) - "A Civil War"
torch

(no subject)

3_foot_6:
Today on our morning walk my dog shCollapse )t a razor blade. A slightly chewed, mildly digested, but very much intact RAZOR BLADE. I pointed and said, "DID YOU DO THIS?" and she gave me a "Yeah, so fCollapse )cking what?" look and wandered away to eat some grass and join a motorcycle gang.

I might be hopelessly lost in a fractured world, but damned if my dog isn't fCollapse )cking hardcore.
Context wants to know if Princess Barksalot makes a good badass biker name.
Bootless Bear

Blown blowjob.

In a bad_sex post, devilindupriest wasn't thinking with the right head, and really regrets it now.

"That moment will be forever etched in my mind. It is my Waterloo. My 'There's no basement in the Alamo'. My Land War In Asia. For a split second everything froze, and for the first and last time in my life I prayed with the fervor of a lapsed catholic holding a pregnancy test. I knew as soon as I'd done it that I'd just made a mistake of such epic proportion that all the screaming souls of hell gained a moments respite while the devil boggled at my stupidity. The stupidity of that moment was so dense, so incredibly powerful that I honestly believe it created a time/space anomaly that altered the timeline and is the real reason most women throughout history have disliked giving head. It was, in short, the Alpha and the Omega of blowjob FAIL."

Context has opened locked the gate. (Original entry is f-locked.)

Nsfw, nsfk, qwp and all that.