September 2nd, 2007


__fantine found some interesting practical applications for mammary tissue

Oh my God, I can't even believe I found this in a serious fic. I think it might be some kind of huge cosmic joke.

Boobs cannot be used as flotation devices.
Yes, they do float sometimes. But unless these are gigantically outsized boobs (we're not talking Rangiku Matsumoto, we're talking grotesque, larger-than-you boobs), they will not support two people in a large body of water.

Guessing that this was written by a twelve-year-old boy who has yet to experience actual breasts,

It would make for interesting airline instructions, though. "In case of water landing, grab nearest busty lass and you should be alright. In the event of a lack of a busty lass, our stewardesses will be glad to help!"

And yes, I did actually google "Breast density" and "Do boobs float?" to make sure I wasn't going nuts here, being small myself. I will never, ever do that again as long as I live.

Context has a disturbingly appropriate icon. QWP

And I bet the Silver Surfer's board would be up on blocks in the front yard

zebrapix finds disappointment and snark in Who Wants To Be A Superhero?:

It's shit like this that makes me think this alternate super hero universe deserves to have Galactus devour it.  Unfortunately, I get the feeling that this universe's Galactus is equally stupid and would bypass eating Earth entirely, settle down and spend his time watching"Big Brother" reruns, licking 9-volt batteries and punching himself in the nuts.

Context contemplates cosmic powered trailer trash.