August 16th, 2007

"With apologies to Dr. Seuss," she says...

ironychan is tired of customers insistently trying to haggle:

..Yet you still think the price too dear
So let me make this good and clear:

You cannot haggle in this shop
The price is set, it will not drop
You cannot save the sales tax
You cannot change the posted facts
Not even if you pay with cash
Or bend right down to cleavage flash
Not even if you scream and rant
Or if the manager's your aunt
And should you wrongly read the sign
I fear that problem's yours, not mine
Context gets even better towards the end; entirely worth reading in entirety.

A terror I can relate to.

In a locked post cranalios guides us through his childhood relationship with rollercoasters:

Memoirs of a Troubled Relationship: cranalios and Amusement Parks

3-5 years: Screaming uncontrollably in the sheep stalls at the Pacific National Exhibition, convinced that the distressed bleating of the animal in question and the flash of the bright shears constituted an act of murder rather than the harvest of fleece.

Collapse )

QWP. Context would rather ride the lollercoaster.

EDIT: Turns out that today in 1898 the rollercoaster was patented. How very timely!