August 7th, 2007

Strumpet

Oh the Horrors!

uncut_diamond is pontificating on Rush Hour 3.

I lie.

I cheat.

I steal.

I've intentionally tried to traumatize little old ladies.

I did dirty tricks for politicians.

I cheated on a girlfriend.

I pick fights with people.

I'm emotionally dishonest.

I defend criminals for a living and I'm not bad at it.

Hell, I'm pretty good at it.

But I never realized just how dead I am inside until today.

Today, when I realized just how much I want to see Rush Hour 3.

Abandon all hope for me my friends.

The end will be sweet and slapstick.

This is all there is. QWP.
Bother!

I Can't Wait for the Sequel, "If Captain Jack Sparrow Ran Greenpeace"

copperbadge posted a picture of the book If Harry Potter Ran General Electric and this thread ensued:

polaris_starz: *falls over*

WHAT.

copperbadge: Apparently he also wrote "If Aristotle Ran General Motors". :D

And if Aristotle DID run General Motors, it would be a good trick seeing as he's been dead 2500 years.

polaris_starz: You know the author is sitting there cackling and thinking of the next improbable title he can sell.

copperbadge: If Legolas Ran IBM...

polaris_starz: If Luke Skywalker Ran Microsoft...

copperbadge: If Jean-Luc Picard Ran Six Apart...

polaris_starz: Oh, man, don't I wish.

If Professor Xavier Ran The CIA--

actually, you know what, that's kind of terrifying.
summer

(no subject)

bunster had a little bit of a problem at work today... (FLOCKED--QWP)

Don't get me wrong, I like Bob Dylan but his music is not "work music". By noon, I felt the effects of acute Bob Dylan Poisoning setting in something awful.... I had become so laid back that I lost the ability to stand and had to work from my office chair. By late afternoon, things had gotten so bad that I had the look and brain activity of Terry Shiavo (before AND after her physical death). I lost the ability to calculate simple dilutions and had to resort to caveperson type drawings on paper to help me understand the routine tasks of my job.
Nom Nom!

(no subject)

lukadia may have found the best possible way to impart logic on the masses.

"If only Earth Logic were delicious home-baked chocolate chip cookies. Then everyone would want to have it inside of them."

Context is making the internets a better place through baking. Cookies for all!
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
Snakeling: Minoan snake goddess

You work at a petshop

For alethiometric, life = RPG.

GENERIC IDIOT (who happens too frequently to get a unique name) approaches CASTLE CASH REGISTER. You don your ARMOR OF CORPORATE-ISSUED RESPONSES - prepare for battle!

You attack with CHEERFUL RETAIL GREETING! GENERIC IDIOT counters with RETURNING MERCHANDISE. RETURNING MERCHANDISE does 0 dmg.

You attack with REQUEST RECEIPT. GENERIC IDIOT attacks with RECEIPT FROM PETDUMB. RECEIPT FROM PETDUMB does 0 dmg.

You attack with THIS IS NOT PETDUMB. Critical hit! GENERIC IDIOT is hit for 50 dmg!

You defeat GENERIC IDIOT!
You gain 50 exp.
You gain SMUG RETAIL VICTORY.

Context, with more.