February 12th, 2007

Wazagan

Funny, I thought John Adams looked like William Daniels

theferrett is less than impressed by the designs for the new United States dollar coin, featuring a variety of badly drawn Presidential heads.

George Washington: I mean, look at that mug. He looks like someone just jammed a cherry tree up his rear, or perhaps his wooden teeth are fracturing in his jaw and filling his gums with splinters. Whenever you withdraw this coin from your pocket, it's as if George Washington himself is disdaining your very decision to spend him, sneering at your paltry desires to purchase a Diet Vanilla Dr. Pepper...

John Adams: Okay, granted. Adams was not the best-looking of Presidents. But the portraits I've seen of him make him look as though he simply didn't pay a lot of attention to his crazy hair, which tended to stick out in a sort of proto-Flock of Seagulls style fashion. They didn't make him appear to live in the basement with his Mom, where he watched Yaoi porn on the internet and occasionally tried to hit on the hot dog rotator down at 7-11. Plus, those ruffles are supposed to be Colonial garb, but really they look like the disco castoffs he bought at Salvation Army's Summer-end sale...

Thomas Jefferson: Okay, this is historically accurate: Jefferson was an egomaniac with no sense of real-life diplomacy, and in this one line drawing he's so smug I want to punch him. I'm holding his coin beneath me, but somehow he's looking down on me with a cocky demeanor that seems to pity me for not having become President myself.

Thankfully, I can feel better about myself, because despite Jefferson's jocular dismissal of my entire lifestyle, I have a hair style that doesn't look like someone glued a bunch of Q-tips to my forehead. Nor do I have a unibrow which shelters small children from the rain. I'm sure this is historically accurate.

James Madison: James Madison, fourth President of our great country, should have been rightfully famed for his amazing ice cream-making skills, which were erroneously attributed to his slutty painting-stealing wife Dolly. But what James Madison was truly known for was being the inspiration for Rum Tum Tugger in Andrew Lloyd Webber's "Cats."...
self; took an axe

you can't get that at KFC

I used to raise mice (for the pet trade, not the feeding pets one) and our housecats quickly learned that anything in a fishtank was off-limits to the kitties... they didn't bother them, even though they still chased wild things like spiders and even rats/wild mice. ...except ONE day...

(cover your eyes)

I woke up and a whole tank, that had been 'full' with a litter of "popcorn" aged mice (when they pop around the tank instead of walking/running because they're just playing so MUCH, but aren't quite ready to adopt/sell yet) ...were suspiciously not there anymore.

The tank had only the mother mouse, looking perfectly un-touched...

...and a dozen tiny tails.

*AUGH*

Apparently the cat thought we meant popcorn mice weren't included in that 'off limits' thing.


--clayshaper, context here
HP - Ravenclaw Ego

In response to some rude_people_suck...

brownkitty responds to this post in customers_suck regarding an incredibly rude woman with an eating disorder:

For the ones like that who are actually ill, I wish they'd get help. For the ones who're convinced that their entire worth is tied up in their looks, they need a clue-by-four. And for the ones who're doing it to be better than someone else, I wish they'd quit screwing around and starve themselves to death.

Edit: ACK! QWP, of course!
Sparky  - MS Paint

Building writing muscles.

marypseud comments on writing amateur fiction as a hobby:


My little metaphor that I use to comfort myself on the subject:

You wouldn't go into a gym and start yelling at the bodybuilders, complaining that they could be outside building a brick wall or doing carpentry and getting paid for it, do you?

Of course not. They'd clobber you.

I'm building up my writing muscles, and it is for me and only for me. The fact that I can't sell what I create means no more than the fact that a set of ten reps leaves no concrete evidence outside your own skin. It is in you. That is what matters. Only you.
nice hat
  • namey

The real enemy of America.

Brown is believed to have access to a time machine and would have spent a great deal of time in the future, at least as far ahead as the year 2015. He thus would have had prior knowledge of the attacks against the U.S.A. which occurred on September 11th, 2001, and yet upon his subsequent return(s) to the year 1985, he neglected to alert authorities! He is therefore wanted for treason and assumed to have ties with possible domestic cells of the al-Qaeda network.

What makes this especially disturbing is that Doc Brown is known to have made deals with Arabic terrorists: Libyans!!


Context has already mutated into human form.
ayaka

(no subject)

dlpn01 reviews a badfic:

Does anyone else hate author notes in the middle of a story? Imagine opening Harry Potter 7 and seeing:
ok so harry potter was in privet drive. (i love privet drive!!! hehe it reminds me of the local coffee shop where i used to write this story and i was sooo poor and had nothinggg and) voldemort and harry die.

SCAR.


context
free! - haru

We have standards, you know!

In this post, oldfoundnew responds to my comment that naked-PETA-lady is nothing to fap over:

That is the truth!

I think if PETA wanted to sell their views with sex, they would've found a sexier sex sexer-upper.

Or maybe if they had more people getting naked at the same time.

...

And also touching.


...and kissing.

BUT NO TONGUES. That would be crossing the line! PETA DOES HAVE STANDARDS YOU KNOW.
  • Current Mood
    anxious anxious
vikings

Warning to those visiting Japan

keitaro_keiichi has been having trouble with the packages he sent himself from Japan.

If any of you are ever in Japan, or plan on going there. Never send stuff home by usps, because when it gets to America, they will do everything in their power, to destroy and/or lose your stuff. Also, they will replace your things with other people's mail. 11 Russian novels, a Chinese storybook, a Korean math textbook, 1 solitary lego, and 6 people's month's subscription to Guidepost magazine. Thanks to those government blowhards, I'll never see my green ranger outfit, several of my japanese porn mags, and also...the brother shoe to the 1 that they bothered to send...

QWP, post here.