August 11th, 2006


(no subject)

notquitesos tells a tale from the craft store:

Ass: Where are your hinges?
S and Me: We don't think we have hinges, they must have been clearanced out a while ago.
Ass: C'mon, you're a craft store that doesn't have hinges?
Me: Sorry, we know it doesn't make sense - you might have to go to a hardware store; there's a Lowe's down the street.
Ass (smiles as he touches my arm): You know what you can do with Lowes?

!!!!! Ten minutes into my shift, and someone tells me to shove Lowe's up my ass.


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New DD Av
  • dduane

No liquids? No way...

A note of annoyance, and an understandable sentiment, from [info]rhiannonstone. Cut for a naughty word...

First they came for the knitting needles, and I didn't speak up
Because I wasn't much of a knitter
Then they came for the shoes, and I didn't speak up
Because I wear sandals
Then they came for the lighters, and I didn't speak up
Because I don't smoke...

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In other news, Mars takes a vow of non-violence

I was a little dubious about this bit: "People love Pluto, children identify with its smallness,"

I can just imagine kids thinking "When I grow up, I want to be eccentric and cold, and so insignificant that it takes a concerted effort to find me."
-james_nicholl comments on an article about Pluto retaining its status as a planet.

-Context wonders if there are Pyramids of Mars, are there also Ice Palaces of Pluto?:
brunette jester

keep your priorities in order, folks

wednes knows what's really important:
We are all upset about that business in merry old England today. But you see, I am an American and I only see other countries in terms of what they give me that I can't get elsewhere. So to all of Britain or the UK or whatever the hell you people call yourselves (that's right, I said "you people" you wanna fight about it?) ;-], hear this now. Get JK Rowling out of the country and keep her safe until she finishes Book Seven!! And you know, keep foiling terrorists before they strike. It's just one of the many, many, many ways in which you embarrass the US with your competance.
shark hug
  • cortie


from eighthevachild on the subject of my sister's crash record this week.

Two cars in two days? That's... amazing! She might have some sort of super power. Keep your eyes out for her rushing off to change into costume or something, or better articulation on the subject of justice. :)


Oh no! Not the Red Bull!

nodakwriter discusses, in comments, feelings about the new airline restrictions in thatwordgrrl's post:

"...We now know the bad guys' latest tactic. (Though truth be told, apparently this is the same tactic that was blocked in a 1994 attempt to blow up planes over the Pacific. So why haven't we been checking fluids for the last 12 years? Could it be that it is a stupid idea that would unnecessarily annoy and panic people?) But no, we have to go on RED ALERT because the Klingons are behind us and Romulan Bird of Prey just decloaked in front of us. And all of them are holding threatening cans of Red Bull."

See the whole thing, here.
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dark goat

That first one reminds me of reading LJ looking for metaquotes, too! :)

Two from mitdasein:

Sifting the poop out of the litter box is a lot like panning for gold, except instead of getting gold, you get poop.

Your chances of success are much higher, though.


A cyclops child was born in India. This defect may have been caused by the drug Cyclopamine that the mother was given.

The drug got its name because its active ingredient made sheep give birth to one-eyed lambs. Hey! Let's give it to PREGNANT WOMEN! IN INDIA! That way, it won't matter, because maybe the kid will get reincarnated into something besides a CYCLOPS. A little Christian baby might be stuck that way for all eternity.

Just to make things more perverse, the drug acts on a signaling molecule in the brain known as Sonic Hedgehog.

I should just give up now.
celtic icon

"Base Depravity," maybe?

beanish let his mind wander at work today...

I found myself humming a tune.

Then I found myself quietly singing lyrics for the tune.

Then I realized I had created a little upbeat ditty entitled "Skull-Fuck Me To Death," and was stuck trying to figure out a rhyme for "nasal cavity."

And then the copies were done.

Context here, even though that's most of the post.
drop bears
  • gwalla

The dream of the blue turtles

from the ever-popular ursulav, here:
It was when I saw tri-colored squirrels that the dream broke--my brain went "Pffah! Tri-colored squirrels are Southeast Asian! No way are they HERE!" And then, disappointed, I realized that all the cool birds--solid blue pigeon-like birds, with elaborate crests and brilliant red spots on the breast, golden herons, etc--weren't real either. Of course, that also meant that I didn't have to worry too much about the pygmy hippopotamus stuck in the revolving door, which was a good thing.
icons_by_li, Chidori, Sasuke

fayestar shares a view on "health" bars

in other news, there is now a protein bar out there called 'think thin!'. pro-anas around the world rejoice. [they've even got a 'french toast' flavour, though i'm 90% certain it'd taste more like 'cardboard box seasoned with hobo piss'.]

Context just wants your spare change, man.
QWP and all that jazz (even tho it's public)
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    amused amused