Metaquotes

X. Thou shalt not decideth that Norrington is now Hott because, essentially speaking, he spentith much of "Dead Man's Chest" throwing up.

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Context doesn't like Sues, savvy? QWP.

skittle_earz thinks up a new twist on an old classic:

"I think it would make a great childrens game.

Like Operation. Remove the breast larvae! WOOO."

Context seriously needs to see a doctor.

In a discussion in londonkds's journal of Pirates of the Carribean 2, this exchange took place:

londonkds: This is traditional HollywoodWorld, where "Lord" is a title that the British Government forces horrible wankers to use so that people will be warned.

oursin: I see - the 'Dark' is silent...

Jim Vowles Eats Babies and Hates Children: FALSE (mostly)
I love kids. Love 'em parboiled.
-jvowles does not enjoy Otakon. Mostly because he's the one running it.

Context should not expect to see Gackt! this year: http://jvowles.livejournal.com/218524.html

Frank: Rowrl.
Tim: Eeee. Eeee. Eeee.
Kate: *snorkx*
Alarm: REEP REEP REEP REEP REE*thud*
Frank: Rowrl.
Kate: *snorkx*
Tim: Eeee. Eeee. Eeee.
Frank: Rowrl.
Alarm: REEP REEP REEP REEP REEP *fumble* REEP *fumble* REE*thud*
Tim: Eeee. Eeee.
Frank: Rowrl? Rowrl rowrl.

- jblum (my husband), here. (Frank and Tim are our cats.)

felisdemens has a rather strange new hairdresser:

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QWP, Context is a natural blonde, in a post that's got more funny bits in it, too.

Arena Stage, this is Danny.

Hi, i wanted to find out if you have any seats available for tonight's show?

We have one seat available.

You dont have two?

No. we have one.

We get this alot; the people who think that by asking us the same question multiple times, or by rephrasing it slightly, that the answer will magically change.

I swear there are people who will ask 5 times in five different ways. I've had the following conversation more times that i can count:

Hi, i wanted to find out if you have any seats available for tonight's show?

We have one seat available.

You dont have 4?

No. we have one.

Are you sure you dont have more?

Yes, i'm afraid so.

You don't even have 3 more?

No, we don't.

So you dont have 4 seats available tonight?

No.

How do you not have 4 seats available?

Well, we sold all the rest, sir.

And you can't find me 3 more?

Yes, sir.. just hold on while i get out the wand. do you want fries with that? maybe we can get the female lead to come service you during intermission?

QWP, of course.

lederhosen gives up and coming BDSM folk some sage advice over on dot_poly_snark

Healthy BDSM boundaries
You can give your master the key to your bedroom. The key to your chastity belt. The key to your heart.

But there are two keys you should never give up, and both of them are called 'Shift'.

Permission knows how to type properly

citrinitas hates the world, and admits something:

I have to admit, though.

"I saw the fucking commercial and the news thing you dumbass motherfucker. You just smoke too much pot to understand that it isn't funny."

I never quite understood why people were so aggressively angry whenever something's not funny to them. It's like.... "It's not funny, bitch! ::shove:: It's supposed to be funny! You're supposed to be funny!" "Please...don't hurt me...." "Well, maybe this TIRE IRON TO THE FACE will make me laugh!!!"

context right over here. (In my journal. THAT is OK, right?) Quoted with permission.

canadianevil works doing telephone surveys. Often you get answering machines making these calls. This was one of them.

Also, I ran into a great answering machine message, when I was calling someone in Hawaii. A very dignified man, with soothing piano music backing him said 'You know what a fun thing to do when someone is out is? Go to their house and pillage their belongings, and then, when they get back, blame it on Vikings!'

But, is it really pillaging if you have permission?