July 13th, 2006

All Your Cookie

A simple discussion about putting down the toilet seat expands to include... kittens

misslynx: I'm fairly insistent on having not just the seat but the actual lid put down, because otherwise it is entirely too likely for things to fall into it. Including, once, my youngest cat.

Have you ever tried to pursue a pee-soaked, panicking ball of furry ninja death equipped with 20 razor-sharp claws through your apartment, apprehend her, carry her back into the very room where she got wet, and shampoo her?

On the bright side, (a) urine is sterile, and (b) by some miracle I did not require stitches afterwards, though I did have to spend considerabel quality time with a bottle of peroxide, a tube of Polysporin, and many small Band-aids.

pixel: No, but I did have to chase a cat with green hair dye coating one paw across the white porcelain sink, white porcelain clawfoot tub and across the white linoleum before he reached the hardwood floors.

Ironically the toilet does come into this. I couldn't figure out how to bath a snarling cat's feet well enough to get the hair dye off without slicing myself to ribbons. So I tossed him in the toilet and stood on the lid, flushing it twice. Since he had nowhere to stand but in the swirling water, his foot got good and clean, and I was relatively safe. After I let him out he sulked under the couch for a good long time though. :)

In the middle of the night, context falls in and gets wet.
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
trusty chords

An Israel/Palestine discussion turns into a theoretical forum about a larger Earth

acrasie comments:

A planet ten times larger than Earth would most likely have to be a gas giant in order to maintain itself so it would definitely have a lot more gravity. Human beings would be crushed quite messily just entering the atmosphere. I think that would solve the whole war problem quite effectively.

SAUCE: http://flemco.livejournal.com/1385999.html

From "Diary of an Internet-Savvy Cat using OKCupid.com"

Day 13: Success! I have received another e-mail! Waitamminit. 8000 miles away? What language is this? What does "u r 2 hawtt, wan 2 fk?" mean? Is that even English? Where does this person live, Mars? Unacceptable. I shall type a reply. "Rowr! Pfffft!!! HISSSSS!!!!! Growl!" There. Hopefully that has expressed the exact degree of my displeasure accurately.

--britpoptarts, Here. The whole thing is a hoot.
  • Current Music
    Duran Duran, "Out Of My Mind (Perfecto Dub 1)"
harley quinn

Scott Adams comments on Zidianity.

On dilbert_blog, Scott Adams recreates the conversation God and Jesus had in order to get Zidane kicked out for his infamous headbutt and arguably forfeit the game for the French.

God: “How do you think we should end this World Cup, Jose?”

Jose: “Kill them all with lightning!”

God: “Nah. Too obvious. I want something unique.”

Jose: “Maybe you could have the bald guy head-butt that other guy.”

God: “Why would he do that? He needs a reason.”

Jose: “You could make that other guy insult the bald guy’s mother and sister.”

God: “What would he say?”

Jose: “Why do you keep asking me questions when you already know what I’m thinking?”

God: “Good point. Okay, you’re thinking I should make the one guy say the other guy’s mother is a two-dollar donkey whore and his sister is the fluffer.”

Jose: “Hee hee!”

I obscenity in the milk of your fathers' context.
  • Current Mood
    bouncy bouncy
... did I leave the oven on?, pensive
  • gisho

Metameta: james_nicoll has a very intruiging cat.

Eddy the autisticat is only smart about objects*. He makes up for it by having the interfeline social skills of a small lump of putty. Once he runs through "poke thoughtfully", "sniff", "gentle bite" and "careen across the room like a drug-crazed cannon-ball" he's out of tools. He's very friendly but has no idea how to interact with other cats.

When I got him, he looked like someone had run a weedwacker over him. This was the legacy, I suspect, of angering every feral cat in the neighborhood.

* But that's ok, because he's mostly only interested in objects. I once saw him lean to one side to see around a bird that was blocking his view of traffic.

I worry about his thoughtful contemplation of my stove.