July 9th, 2006

Calgary

weemallard weighs in on whether fat really is a feminist issue:

Dear women, and there are several of you, and you know who you are,

Let others pour the balm of reassurance on your creased brows, as they most assuredly have and most assuredly will continue to do. I see no particular point in being nice about this.

So, without further ado ...

There is nothing quite so uplifting as hearing otherwise intelligent and articulate women going on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on about their

God.
Damn.
Weight.

No. Truly. It thrills me to see the several of you rehashing the same body issues for (glances at watch) years on end. Because

God.
Only.
Knows.

there's no such thing as getting over it, refining one's values, or finding something actually interesting and worthwhile to do.

Women more slender than you? Snatching the very air from your lungs. Don't stop hating 'em.

Sorry, women (except that I'm not). At the doctor's today I topped the scales at 211 pounds. I have plans to immediately douse myself in fingernail polish remover and set myself on fire, because even though I'm a pretty swell person (present moment excluded), and even though my husband thinks I'm just absolutely the bee's knees, and even though this fascinating, exciting world is a big place, IT'S NOT AS BIG AS MY ASS.

And that's the only thing that really counts.

(QWP, here)
chill frog
  • wtf

Today's secret word is...

enygma manages a store for a Large Video Game Retailer.

"Lesee, apparently there's a message board somewhere on the net (imagine that) that some kid posted if you call stores like mine and say a direct quote word for word, we'll invite you in and give you pre-release Nintendo Wii system. I think I speak for everyone in my company when I say "...". A kid called and did this to my assistant manager Friday, and more or less made a complete pest of himself. After spouting off his little quote, he followed it up with, "Are you sure you don't know what I'm talking about or do I just have the quote wrong...just cough if you can't say anything because there are people in the store." Again, "..." Think about it logically, stupid youth of America. Nintendo is in the business of selling systems and games, not giving them away to morons who read the internet and believe in James Bond friggin' MI-6 secret codes. Oh wait, that's right, Nintendo is giving away Wii's. First you have to go to a the major city in your area, take the elevator to the highest floor, then jump off. At ground level, Mario will be there with your brand new Wii. Enjoy!"

Spelling corrected. QWP.
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99 monkeys jumpin' on the bed!

(no subject)

seraphic_slayer has a silly, silly question:
If we were to stealthily, with much stealth, make our way into Sea World, what animal would you steal away with you upon our departure? Also what would you name it and then do with it?

I have chosen to steal a seal, name it Harold and engage in cross-country crime solving adventures.

Harold would wear a straw hat.
From here, public post, and there is no context, only Zuul.
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big ben + london
  • sobota

life, liberty, and the pursuit of lj etiquette.

juleskicks has some words to say in an amusing 19th century style on lj etiquette.

Being a most Vile and Infuriating Act, Trolling is committed in general by those who are either more fortunate than most in having a great surplus of Time (that most precious of commodities!) or less fortunate in that they are very sadly lacking in Attention, to have to stoop to such an atrocious act that they might gain some.

read the whole thing, it's a laugh. qwp, public.

[oh, congrats to you bloody italian fans. allez les bleus! for those of us that aren't.]
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