Metaquotes

In this (friends-locked) post in my personal journal about starting my job as a concessions monkey at a theatre, bk_comics had this to say about sneaking in snacks...

Do they check pockets? I have a pair of khakis that could smuggle Jews. They're Schindler's Pants.

QWP :3

From a locked post, QWP..

bpcslave is bemoaning the regrettable tendency many people have to anointing their offspring with decidedly...peculiar names:


I have images in my head of a playschool a few years from now, populated by children who have names like porn spam emails...

"Arrhythmia Quantity, don't throw those toys at Essential Cheesemongery! And please sit down, Langerhams Servomechanism, there's a dear. Yes, just there, next to Custodian Whimsical and Haberdashery Kumquat."

Get a dog instead. ¬¬

Over in customers_suck, amadruadaboleyn addresses a mini-rant to all those gawkers:

YES, I AM BUSTY.

I AM VERY FUCKING BOSOMY.

I KNOW THIS.

NO ONE HAS TO TELL ME.

I WILL NOT BE SURPRISED.

I DID NOT JUST WAKE UP ONE DAY AND GO, "OH, HOLY FUCK, I'VE GROWN TWO VERY SEXY TUMORS."

THEY'VE BEEN AROUND FOR A WHILE NOW.

SHUT UP.

Context is here.

Public post, but QWP anyway!

richdudley has trouble with a gang of kids:

One kid shouted out "Are you f*****g paedos?" which lightened the mood a little because if we were, it was nice to think he was so close to the house.

Locked post but QWP.

QWP from a locked post in poggs LJ. (What you see here is the entire post.)

Hearing a group of travellers blagging 1st Class on the train and saying "Nobody's sitting there", then being caught by undercover Revenue Protection, is quite evil and satisfying.

Unfortunately, I've used up all my evil and will have to be nice to the users today.

In the midst of discussing some very UNsolemn funeral practices, wmute states that his remains "should be donated to medical science. Or any science, really, but medicine seems to have the most obvious uses for it."

To which gregory07 proposes: "Donate the remains to your local tech college's engineering department 'for use in studying the application of the trebuchet.'"

Upon reading my post about a really soul-crushing fic I'd found...

akavertigo: I can actually feel my brain trying to reject the text, like a super-powered holy toaster trying to expel a charred slice of Satan.

"I have a long list of shit to do to prep for the fumigation, which will happen God knows when, but hopefully next week.

I don't want to do any of it.

I just want those fucking bugs to pack their own damn suitcases and move out. Find someone else to bite all night.

...But if they wanted to clean up my apartment as they were leaving, well. I wouldn't mind."

--tamalinn in a locked post, QWP.