April 28th, 2006

Callistofire

(no subject)

I was feeling down. Said something in a friends locked entry to the effect of not knowing what I want anymore. My friend alex_antonin who always knows how to cheer me up responds with...

*In a mock Asian accent worthy of Dat Phan* You want nice Vietnamese girl. Small, compact, fit nicely under bed between unused Stairmaster and dusty Thighmaster. Better than Thighmaster, she be master of your thighs. Give you more head than twenty cannibal tribe in Papua New Guinea. Don't delay, act now! Fitty dolla make you holla!

QWP



Also, bleedingcherub expresses her rage at Ken Blackwell:
Dear Ken Blackwell, OH Governor candidate:
I saw your ad on TV about courageously "defending marriage" and singlehandedly getting the Marriage Amendment passed in OH. What's so courageous about siding with majority values? Unlike some, you're obviously not in danger of, say, ridicule and violence voicing your beliefs. And what the hell is with the red-tinted warning-like screen and accusatory voice discussing your opponent "siding with liberals for same-sex marriage," then showing a male-male couple on a park bench within the red tint as though they were burning in the fires of Hell? Were they feeding birds on your turf or something? WHAT IS SO BRAVE ABOUT "DEFENDING" OHIO FROM A HAPPY COUPLE AT THE PARK?


Context. QWP.

lol

Over at customersuck soulsearcher139 had a few things to say to her customers


"I hate to break it to you lady, but your kids are part of the reason theres a prochoice movement"


the whole post is pretty good

http://community.livejournal.com/customers_suck/16194642.html


and yes QWP I asked over at her personal page.


thanks
  • Current Mood
    cheerful cheerful

(no subject)

damn_tatterhood gives suggestions of how to deal with an annoying husband of wuglet's cousin who asked wuglet (a college student) to proofread his dissertation. I hope that sentence made sense. The bit involving Latin especially made me giggle.

Perhaps you could slip a little note on the back page stating that since you're a student, and therefore a non-stop party animal, you finished correcting his dissertation while stinking drunk. Hey, his fault for asking a student he knew would be up until three in the motherfucking morning with a bottle of tequila and some crayons. Then break out the Crayolas and draw all over the goddamn thing. Stick figure diagrams of you planting this cockslap's head firmly up his ass come to mind. Replace any mention of his name with "COCKFACE." Just write a big red "NO" over an entire paragraph without any other explanation*. Order pizza and be sure to wipe your mouth on any odd numbered pages. Practice your fingerpainting. Make your corrections in Latin. Make your corrections in pig-Latin. Make your corrections in pig-Latin Latin. And be sure to blame the whole thing on the fact that he was right, you're a constant drunk and it's all his fault for having hired you to do the corrections for him.

Comment is here, original post is here.

And remember: NEVER piss damn_tatterhood off!
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
me pie glasses

(no subject)

karinablack, responding to my admission that I didn't hate Waterworld:



Every time I try to sit and watch Waterworld, I end up having super hot sex instead.
.
.
.
have been thinking of buying it.



Here, and quoted with permission for good measure.
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
Default

And now, for the First Negative Rebuttal...

kaura_nighthawk has an epiphany about the state of the nation: (Entire post, quoted with permission even though it is a public entry)

"I've got it! I've got it! I've finally figured out why I hate George W. Bush and the Neoconservative movement so bloody much!

They remind me of every hack, two-bit high school competitive policy debater in existence!

Hell, they remind me of me during the first three months of my gig in that activity. -_-;

See, it's so very bloody obvious that everything they say is directed more towards the goal of winning than actually, yanno, making a good policy! They're aggressively competitive, and everything in me says that, though it's certainly effective in winning seats in Congress, that's not how you run a government!

Treating politics like a massive debate tournament's got to be the stupidest way to approach it- EVER- and it's exactly how they're doing it!

Whew. And I was beginning to think that my vendetta against them was unfounded. >_>"