March 17th, 2006

agent may is unimpressed

Rosary 2.0

I mean, okay ... call me weird, but this reminds me of Pleasant Company and the American Girls dolls. Remember? There used to be three: Kirsten, Samantha, and Molly. It was three. Three three three. Maybe they added the birthday furniture, maybe they gave them new summer and winter clothes, but it was always three.

Then along comes Felicity. Oh, little Felicity. Felicity, the amazing Colonial shark-jumper of Pleasant Company. Once she came along with her mahogany canopy bed and her blue silk Christmas dress with interchangeable stomachers, it was all over. Now there are, what, eighty-seven of them? And half of them are from Williamsburg.

... what was I talking about again? Oh, yeah. God.


--princesskraehe, on the changes the Catholic Church made to praying the Rosary. The whole thing's amusing. F-locked, QWP, but she says if there's enough interest, she'll unlock the whole thing.
Vader (artslave)

(no subject)

scendan rants about the upcoming Star Wars TV series:

Episode 2 (Luke is 9 years old): There is a dramatic sandstorm, causing the Lars household to remain cooped up in their subterranean chateau for the entire episode. Luke, bored, tries to rewire the Treadwell, causing it to sing Barbra Streisand tunes. Uncle Owen takes the strap to him. Beru tries to defend him and is cut down by her husband. Fade to black in a side-to-side wipe.

The whole thing is quite amusing; it was hard to pick one thing to quote.
  • Current Mood
    cheerful cheerful
River Llama song

It's the mark of the beast!

terwashere has a devil of a drive through job:

So one day this guy orders a few things, and has a dreaded coupon for a Chalupa (Damn you, Trail Blazers!). His total was Six Dollars and Sixty-six Cents. 666!

He gets to the window and, since I hate the coupons and look at what his total was... I said, "Okay, that'll be $6.66.... and your SOUL!"

Bastard didn't know what I was talking about. "Oh, do I get something special if that's my total?"

I sighed and replied, "Um, it has to do with some movie. Nevermind."

Dammit. v_v'


Who needs context?
smirking

The doctor is in

In a hilarious entry, chelleann77 describes her visit to her scottish doctor, and the three prescriptions he gave:

I'm normally a ridiculously healthy person. And so when he got started I kind of shrugged it off. I'm still young enough not to take anything short of broken bones poking OUT of my skin seriously. But he kept talking, and the rrrrrs were rolling furiosly and then there were the prescriptions. 3 of them. One for a mega dose of amoxicillin that he promises will make me nauseous but he says is necessary. ( I think he views it as my penance.) The next is for something called an expectorant so that the crap that is lingering in my chest will leave. The third is for a much lower level non nasueous dose of amoxicillian that i have to be on FOREVER after the higher dose because at that point my immune system will be severely compromised and he doesn't want anything else coming to live in my chest. You know like aliens.

The entire laugh can be had here
todd cocaine

Wank free or die...

valmontheights is asked her solemn opinion...

Imaginary Conversation that Just Might Happen One of These Days:

Interviewer: So what do you think about the Indonesian government's plan to introduce a new Anti-Pornography Legislation into the national laws?

Me: I'm against it.

Interviewer: Why?

*This is where I pause to consider all of those intellectual answer, ranging from how the law basically tramples human rights of self-expression and has the possibility of creating unfair situations for women and invading on citizens' privacy, but then decide what-the-heck and go for the simple truth*.


Me: Because I like porn.
  • Current Mood
    amused amused
conversational

(no subject)

supermeghan brings us (via this public post in mock_the_stupid) a series of amusing vignettes about a guy she dubs Manwhore. he's not the brightest crayon in the box.

the entire post is funny, but these two had me dying:

2. Manwhore: Let's play trivia. Ask me a question.
Me: I have one. Are you stupid? (I have mad skillz at insulting people.)
Manwhore: That's not a question!


13. Me: Sasha and I are going to eat at a vegetarian restaurant for lunch.
Manwhore: There's nothing at vegetarian restaurants but salad.
Me: That's not true, there's a buffet of--
Manwhore: Salad.
Me: --stir fry, tofu, potatoes, yams...
Manwhore: Aren't yams Jewish?
  • Current Music
    "date rape" by sublime
Flypaper - odangoatama

I should have done this ages ago...

I'm so lazy. I intended to metaquote this post by lied_ohne_worte weeks ago. Really, I did.

Anyway, here's the quote:

Dear person who is beating a great drum once every second in the street before my house:

You started at 23:30. It is 23:47 now. I have the suspicion that you will continue at least until midnight because it surely has to do something with carnival, and it is Ash Wednesday tomorrow, so all carnival must stop.

I DON'T CARE! MY HEAD IS ACHING, AND I WANT YOU TO SHUT UP NOW!


Well, it made me drinkscreen at the time.

Context is for the weak, but I've linked above.